I had already assumed people were focused on my vagina because I had been blogging about sexual abuse (I even spoke about it at an event and posted the video on my youtube channel). I agonized over sharing my history. Even though I received a lot of support, I lost A LOT of friends. Grown up me understands that not everyone is ready to talk and not everyone wanted to hear what I was staying. The bigger parts of my brain and heart were just hurt and confused. Yes I knew it was possible. It still hurt.
I have been thinking there might be a whole other dimension to parenting for those of us who are survivors. From vagina land right to the PTA meetings. There’s a space between the angry/childless/feminist/survivor Vagina Monologues (a collection of monologues about sexual violence, healing and getting to know one’s vagina) and the syrupy sweet, non-feminist, nothing bad ever happened except parenthood Momologues (a play that follows four women from birth of their children to kindergarten).
So in an effort to bring my worlds together, I’ve started working on the Vagina Momologues.